It’s been a LONG time since I went to church for a full mass. Sunday was worth blogging about.
I have been thinking about it for a long time but just couldn’t seem to get up the nerve. There are so many situations that occurred why I have not continued and I will share a few with you now then I will tell you about my experience Sunday.
We grew up Catholic. I went to Catholic School pretty much my entire life, my parents went to Catholic School, my grandmothers both attended church daily and I was married in the Catholic Church.
Guilt! That feeling of guilt that I remember feeling if I did not go to church every Sunday. The guilt was not from my mom, but it was a deeper feeling that I felt from the church/school itself.
Now you all probably know what the last is. Yep. The disgusting database of sexual abuse by priests. I am not here to write about that but when I told Woody I was going to church, he was shocked and said “do me one favor when you go”. “Think of our kids”.
I get it. I agree. I still went. I felt the need to go and trying to keep those horrific thoughts out of my head.
Prayer has always been something I believe in. I pray every night. Contemplative Prayer.
I have faith and I believe.
I do not believe you have to go to church to pray. Since Kelsey was struck by a car this September, I pray more and more. Shit, I have been praying so much I am actually enrolled in a 21 Days of Prayer to Change Your Life Course. It’s not a religious course. These are prayers about The Strength of Vulnerability, Letting Go, Forgiveness, The Power of Prayer and THANK YOU!! A big one for me. Anyway; back to my field trip to church.
I did not go alone. During a few of my classes, I have been talking about going back to church. One of my beautiful students, Mrs. Kate Liggett invited me to go with her. Kate talked about this young, “hip” priest at St. Martha’s. Kate described his physical appearance as “Jesus Christ”. The picture was embedded in my head. She said he was engaging, funny, and people love him. That is all I needed to hear.
Sunday after class I met Kate at Church.
I was nervous. My belly felt nauseous. That guilt of not being there in so many years was settling in.
We sat in the front.
Once the Priest got to the altar, I could not believe my eyes. He is young, hip, wore Dock Martins and had a Mala Bracelet on and holy shit; HE LOOKED LIKE JESUS!! Ha ha.
Not a grey hair in his hippie, long hair.
As mass began, I thought I had remembered the prayers of the catholic church, but that certainly changed. That’s how long it’s been.
Now it was time for The Sermon. I could not believe my ears. This priest started off talking about rock, paper, scissors and was engaging with the parishioners of all ages. People were laughing and participating. I could not stop smiling. I was 100% fully engaged.
Next up musical chairs!! I won’t get into the entire sermon, but the first thing that popped in my head was Wayne Dyer, his daughters book and the dharma and blog I wrote a few weeks ago. This priest reads Wayne Dyer!! We spoke about the same thing!! “Don’t Die with Your Music Still in You”.
As he continued to conclude his sermon; his ending was simple and true. “You never know when the music is going to stop, so live everyday like it’s your last”.
I finally found somewhere to go to listen to a really good dharma. Yoga for my mind and soul while sitting on the other side of an altar.
Thank you Kate!!!